Saturday, September 05, 2020

Life

Life has been such a ride from the start go. Everyday there is so much to understand.

As a toddler, I am told that I was Utpatia. It means close to a naughty restless kid. Perhaps my first date with life happened then when I flexed my arm to look at a vessel kept above a height to keep me away from the contents. I had to flex the feet, arm and hand to reach the upper rim of the vessel and pull it towards me. 

It had chilly powder. Truth did hurt. I had a swollen bear face and I am told that a litre of milk was poured on my face to ease the hurt.

From then I think it was this urge of knowing that made me open every toy before I did what the toy was meant for. Play.

Slowly, I realised that playing the toy won’t have given me the joy that I used to find opening it.

Some of the most memorable vessels that I have overturned and  toys that I have unscrewed and tasted the joy and pain of truth would be woman (and man), poverty, greed, ambition, career, urbanisation, hometown blues and parenthood.

When I wrote wrong answers deliberately on my compulsory NDA exam, and then refused an engineering degree to study economics in Cotton, it was one of my best search. Quitting my Deutsche Bank career to a life of spiritual growth in Duliajan with my parents was my second best ‘overturning the vessel’ search. 

I am still opening up toys. Only difference is that the toys are adult boring stuff like books, meditation and prayers. You see knowledge gets boring for a lot of people when it gets higher in terms of enlightenment. That is the reason why so few people read books, meditate and pray in the real sense of the word. Among my books, I prefer history, philosophy and spiritual studies. Interestingly, science do not interest me as well. I think the reason may be that I love discovery more than inventions.

For the thirsty, knowledge however is never boring. Knowledge starts with information and data and slowly converge into truths and then finally into one absolute truth.

All these years of search have brought me closer to the absolute truth, the one and only beauty. The truth that is nothingness. A happy nothingness. Every philosopher and spiritual guru has spoken of this one-ness in different languages and manner of speaking. I see exactness in the writings of Gurujona Srimanta Sankardeva, the great disciple Shri Shri Madhavdeva, Plato and even Osho... and so many other intellectuals in search of truth and truth only.

The truth is so blissful that you slowly feel no need for money, material comfort and even moksha.