Wednesday, March 24, 2010

What's wrong with live-in relationships, asks Supreme Court

Marriage as a forceful essential convention has got a kick in the butt.

The Supreme Court yesterday opined that a man and woman living together without marriage cannot be construed as an offence. This, along with the January 2008 Supreme Court ruling stating that 'if a man and woman are involved in a live-in relationship for a long period, they will be treated as a married couple and their child would be called legitimate', makes for a great change in the Indian social fabric.

With respect to physical security, the female of live in relationship is already given protection under the Domestic Violence Act 2005. In terms of the fear that the male partner may leave the girl with kids is also no longer true. In the court of law, it will be very easy for her to prove legitimacy.

With respect to children, the SC judgement has dispelled all doubts and apprehensions crucial for the children’s future, their prestige and treatment among the society. They will be treated at equal footing in the court of law.

I have always questioned marriage as being the ultimate weapon for eternal togetherness. You may want to read this. These changing societal landscape only proves that nature ultimately will raise its head out of human-created shackles like marriage. Although it may not reduce the significance of marriage as a safe institution, but it will surely encourage and support the rebels to follow their instincts and conscience.

Like the Indian economy grew after the 1991 liberalisation, the social economy will also get enhanced by this liberty given to choose the way we want to spend our life with our partners.

This will also bring women into equal economic footing, as they don't have to face the pressures of convention inside a marriage.

Divorce and break-ups will be a lesser taboo and emotionally less draining. It will ultimately be considered natural.

Relationships will be stronger, as the likelihood of each partner taking the other for granted will be lesser. We all know that marriage as a social bind changes the dynamics of a relationship. 'Shaadi ke baad change ho gaya hain' will be a lesser heard phrase.

This judgements and developments may finally make 'marriage' a lesser inspiration for jokes. It may lead to lessening of the significance of one of the oldest proverb - 'Shaadi ke laddoo jo khaye woh pashtaye, Jo nehi khaye woh bhi (nehi) pashtaye!'

Jay Ho!


  1. Anonymous9:56 PM

    I had these thoughts in my mind too - loved this post. I, in fact feel this is better than being married for women from very conservative societies.

  2. Deepankar10:08 PM

    Very true...but it will take some time for the social fabric to accept it.

  3. Ya IHM. I think so too. But how do you tell them. In my facebook comments, one comment read, "I stand for marriage and family....not only for now but forever...i dont guarantee if i will be happy with marraige or family but I support the very concept!" So it is so deeprooted that people have a blind eye to it. The fact that it is actually helping woman is hidden. Anyways time and tide will explain the obvious.

  4. Joo. Thanks for the comment. You are right but this kind of wave when starts may have a great velocity. And the change will take place very fast within 50-60 years - short time when we look at history.

  5. As long as the couple is in sync it does not matter if they take "saat pheras" or not. I agree that it will ease a lot of pressure from women. This whole idea of getting the society's blessing so that the couple is under pressure to stay together is not right. And more often, the woman is expected to make adjustments, sacrifices and even bear abuse to stay in the marriage.
    Good post.

  6. Thanks tomboy (for the lack of a better name that I know). Really glad that you liked the post.

    I tend to think that saat pheras in front a pandit and a thousand witness throw 'in sync' out of the window. In-sync between two people is a circumstantial concept. We humans have millions of facets to our personality and saat pheras somehow bring out some of those facets which the boy and the girl never saw of each other.

    ...And then starts the journey of adjustments, sacrifices and abuses.

    Some couples are extremely compatible and some couples have very high relationship quotient, and so they stay happy. Rest of us adjust, sacrifice, abuse, and crib....


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